I wanted to write a new post today. It was on my list, along with many other items that have been on that list for weeks, even months. Our only plans today were to go to the gym this morning, which we did, but then real life decided to step in and give me a horrible migraine. I know when they're coming...the blurry vision and dull headache start and within an hour I have a full on, can't open my eyes, don't make a sound migraine. Luckily after tylenol and chugging a ton of water they tend to go away fairly quickly, but tell that to two toddlers. Needless to say, most of the pain has passed, Audrey is thankfully napping and Aiden seems happy playing in a dark basement with no sound except his trucks taking turns down the Little Tykes slide.
One of the first lessons you learn as a mom is to plan, but don't count on those plans actually happening. Because they probably won't. It sounds depressing when you say it out loud, but really I think it's life's way of guiding us along the correct path. Not an easy thing to admit when you're type A and like to have control over everything.
So back to that to-do list and my biggest challenge at the moment.
I can handle a mess, I know that comes with kids and I've accepted it. But our house looks like this 98% of the time and I need a better system. I've been working with both kids on how to clean up and put away toys, but the problem is, we don't have an easy set up for putting them away. We have some of those small totes and one big basket, with a similar setup downstairs (which often looks the same). Bigger toys don't have a place to go and the little ones gets all mixed up so they are no longer easy to play with. Before you start thinking, "this is her biggest challenge?!" keep in mind that this issue affects a lot of other things. I need my kids to be able to play by themselves from time to time and that isn't happening. Aiden doesn't nap, so ideally he would play by himself for at least part of Audrey's nap time so I could, oh, I don't know, clean our bathroom every once in awhile.
I've found it very difficult recently to balance having control and structure while also being flexible and taking advantage of fun moments with the kids. I'm probably being too hard on myself, but aren't all moms? I did have a moment the other day when I realized how happy I am right now. I hope this post doesn't come off as unappreciative or whiney, because that is definitely not my intent.
Headaches happen (usually when my kids are eager to play), illnesses strike (always on holidays) and messes are around me everyday. That's real life. But as I type, Aiden came up and wrapped his arms around my neck and said, "Feeling better mommy?" I am now, buddy. And this real life is pretty amazing.
And PS...if anyone has any suggestions on how to organize my spaces, I'd love to hear them! :)