The unfortunate part of a weight loss journey is that it is never over. If you've struggled with weight, you know that it is very hard to not think about it a lot, and at times constantly. As sad as it sounds, I can honestly say that there has not been a single day in the past 20+ years that I have not thought about my weight in some capacity. BUT...I will say that my thoughts and outlook have changed over the years. My thoughts are now on how I am feeling, my fitness, healthy eating and creating a balance that allows me to not feel deprived, rather than focusing on the way I look and how much I weigh. This is definitely a healthy change, but it still frustrates me that I think about it so often.
It dawned on me recently that there are people in my life now who didn't know me 75 pounds ago. They didn't know me when I was feeling depressed, tired and negative about life. Some are surprised when I share my journey and why it began and they are even more surprised when they see my "before" pictures. I look at those pictures now and I have a mixture of emotions - pride, relief and also fear and sadness. I am afraid of going back to that place and leaving behind the way I feel right now and I am sad that I wasted time feeling that way.
But, in a way, I don't regret it at all and I wouldn't change the path it took to get me here. I am stronger because of the teasing I endured as a kid. I am also more compassionate. I am confident now because I wasn't then; I had to learn that it comes from within. I have such a great perspective and understanding of self-esteem and health that I am now able to share with my kids. But I know that they will have their own paths when it comes to health and confidence and I will have to allow them to learn it for themselves.
On Mondays, my Instagram feed is filled with "Monday Motivation." Quotes, stories and pictures to help start the week off right. I have always loved reading about other's stories and have found inspiration in other's strength. I have had people tell me that I am an inspiration, which makes me a little uncomfortable and VERY humbled. I do hope that I can inspire people to strive to feel their very best, in whatever way works for them. Life is too short and too precious to live your own life standing on the sidelines, wishing things were different. My weight loss has pushed me to put myself out there in other ways and it's created new challenges and new opportunities that have filled my life with joy. The unexpected can sometimes be the most rewarding.
I am selfishly using this "Monday Motivation" post to refocus and prioritize my own thoughts. Hopefully it gives you a little push to do the same! Have a beautiful week :).